During the process,especally in the times of knowledge explosion ,when news , facts,opinions even rumors have been bombarding us from every corner of the world. If we hope to witness the ideal scene in which people enjoy their life to the uttermost , cooperation would be a indispensable spirit.
【存在问题：第一段中的句子结构过于复杂，不连贯，不通顺
第三段中的开头部分，过于罗嗦。
整体上过于强调句式，而忽略了文章本身的连贯性。
】
再次修改的。

There has been a heatted discussion about the picture. As is shown above ,there are two handicapped men with their walking sticks standing in the road , one is lame in the left,while the other is in the left,going ahead with each other’s help.I believe many people can understand the deep meaning that the picture bring to us .

Our human history has been filled with a variety of examples of Cooperation,with the wenchuan earthquake reconstruction being the foremost.After the disaster ,people from all walks of life in the society were mobilized actively and united as one group,which is so called Cooperation. According to the last survey ,the number of people participated in the rebuilding after disaster reached as many as 7,000,000,which is the population of a big city .We can image if there were no cooperation of the whole society , hardly can wenchuan’s people restore their home .

Now we live in the times of knowledge explosion , when news , facts, opinions even rumors bombarding us from every corner of the world . If we hope to witness the ideal scene in which people enjoy their life to the uttermost ,cooperation would be a indispensable spirit.

我写得………………

In America .The burglary happen in every 15 seconds. Statistics show that there are more than 2 million houses being   suffered  burglary.People almost can’t be hold the burglary at bay.What they can do was just prevent them a few minutes,made them expose to the police patrol or the surrounding people. The general sense tell us , lighting is the barrier of criminal activity.It is necessary to put a light on the front door and light it at night..Whether you believe it or not .some people ,especially children who are the last one in and leave the front door on the latch at night. Door of hollow vulnerable to burlgar ,even though it is locked . so the solid core  or the icon door is the best choice which is difficult to be pried open. If you are willing to buy alarm system,Don’t forget take sign  of alarm device and paste it on windows and doors.At last . Attention . When you travel out ,let a believed neighbor take your newspapers and mails  everyday before you back , or it will be a advertisement that tells people the home has no one.

课本上带的译文。明显的比我用词地道.值得学习。

A burglary is reported every 15 seconds in the United States. Statistics show burglars entered more than 2 millon homes last year. Actually it is almost impossible to keep a determined burglar out . All you can do is  discourage hime for a few minutes, thus exposing him to police  patrols or those wandering around. Common sense tells us that lighting is a barrier to criminal activity . A light should be fixed in the doorway and switched on at night. Believe it or not . some people ,particularly children who happend to be the last to come in ,leave their doors on the latch at night. Doors of hollow core ,even when locked,are vulnerable to break-ins. Thus doors of solid core or steel are much preferred as the make it difficult  for the burglar to pry open . If you decide to buy an alarm device. be sure to ask for its signs and put them up on both windows and doors. Finally ,a word of warning —when you travel,make sure that you have a trusted neighbor collect and keep all the deliveries of newspapers and mail until you return . This is because a collection of newspapers and mail on the front doorstep or in you mailbox is an advertisement that no one is home .

自己写得文章有几处硬伤，还是对比原文来改动吧。